For You Anything
by I.Dunno.They've.Got.Brooms
Summary: Alice/Jasper. Alice's family abandons her. Jasper hates the lifestyle he is living. Then they meet each other... DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of these characters! They belong to S.Meyer. Thanks.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. I wish. Alas, they belong to S. Meyer.

One

She shot upright in her bed, breath coming in short gasps. Strips of her long dark hair were plastered to her face. It had only been a dream, that was all. It took her a moment to realize that what she had just seen and experienced was not real. She sighed and climbed out of the bed and walked quietly to the bathroom. She knew her parents would be upset with her if they found out she was still having these sorts of dreams, they were not too pleased with the idea that she claimed to see things happen before they actually did. They thought she was crazy, and had warned her that if she were to continue making false accusations about things that she would be punished. She was young, it's not as though she was asking for these sorts of visions to come into her mind, they came whether she wanted them or not.

She reached forward and turned the water on, she ran the cold water over her face as she felt her heartbeat slow, and she inhaled a deep breath. She looked up and saw her eyes staring back her wide and still shocked at what she had seen. She shook her head and opened the door to the bathroom. The moment that she stepped out into the hallway she felt her heart quicken in pace, and she saw her parents standing in the hallway staring back at her. The dreaded feeling of déjà-vu set in twisting her stomach into an uncomfortable feeling. This couldn't possibly be happening, could it?

"Mary…" Her mother began.

She looked at her father, he could not bear to look back at his daughter. He could not understand where he had gone wrong with her. "Mother?"

She suddenly heard footsteps behind her and she turned to find a group of unfamiliar, and yet all too familiar, people standing behind her. She backed away from them, closing the space in between her and her own parents who stood there with looks of pity, and regret. Her father's arms wrapped around her, holding her tightly to him so that she could not move or struggle against him. Her small frame was nothing in comparison to his large and strong one however that did not stop her from putting up the biggest struggle she could.

"No! Please let me go! I promise… I promise it won't happen again!"

"Take her, please." Her mother said as she turned away from her daughter and the scene enfolding in front her. She may love her daughter, but she was not going to allow the family name to be ruined by some fictional ability that her daughter thought she had.

Another young girl stepped into the hall. Her sister. She stood staring back at Mary, fear registering in her eyes as she watched her very own sister struggle against the restraint of her father, and the strange people that were there trying to get her to stop.

"Mary?" She asked, her voice unsteady with emotion.

Her mother quickly turned at the sound of her other daughter's voice, and she rushed towards her leading her away. Mary heard what her mother told her sister as they walked away. "Your sister is very sick. These people are going to try to help her. She is only going to see the doctor for a little while, and hopefully she will be back very soon…"

"But… I want to go with her!" Her sister cried.

"NO!" Her mother yelled, pulling her sister out of view.

She suddenly realized that no matter how hard she fought her fate was going to come. The scene flashed before her eyes, everything had gone dark. There was nothing in her future. She stopped fighting allowing them to take her wherever they wanted to take her. There was no point in fighting when there was nothing to fight for anymore. Why? It would end badly no matter how she tried to look at it. These people were going to take her away, and that was the end of that.

She was put into a car, she could see that the night sky was a cruel dark cover, allowing no stars to lighten its gloom, nobody would ever know that she had been taken away. There would be no hope of anyone saving her from her inevitable fate. She leaned her head back against the hard surface and felt the tears rolling down her cheeks. Closing her eyes she let out a shaking breath. She would never forget the sight of her sister's face staring back at her, her mother turning her back to her proving she wanted nothing more to do with her, the sight of her father's look of regret.

The drive was silent, nobody said anything to her, and she did not struggle against anyone as she was carried into a large building. She had never seen this place before, and the look of it from the outside alone was intimidating. She was put into a room so black that she could not even see her own hand in front of her face, let alone how big or small this room was. She took a few steps and collapsed to the floor letting the darkness envelop her. She had lost this fight.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Leaning against a wall in a dark corner of the room his head in his hands he tried to ignore it all, he tried to ignore the feelings eating him alive. His throat was burning from thirst, but that was almost a minor feeling compared to everything else. Hate coursed through him, anger, fear, greed, and more thirst. None of these feelings were his, and yet they all became his in the end. There was no fighting the feelings that he felt around him, he hated living his life so controlled by how everyone else was feeling.

He was on his horse again, three small women walking alone. He could have sworn he had led everyone to the destination… but he got off the horse to help them. He could remember their eyes, and he was frozen in shock, the terror that went through his body held him in place along with the fascination of how beautiful they were. They had angel's faces, with eyes that could scare anyone. He felt the pain that had lasted for days afterward… he had wanted to die, he had wished the pain would end, how could he possibly survive through all of this?

He shook his head. He couldn't think about that day again, it was a day so long ago that it was as though it was just a dream. He had been living this life so long now, and he had a duty. He was still leading many into battle, he still taught them how to fight, but it was nothing like what he had lived through before. He would have preferred to have been shot with a musket, bayoneted to death by the enemy, anything would have been better than this life.

A fight was brewing between members of the army, he could feel it. He quickly rose from where he had hidden himself away from everyone and found a group of them split into two facing each other. He took a deep breath and saw that everyone calmed down. The fight was forgotten and they all turned to him, he was their leader, they admired him, looked up to him, wanted to be like him.

"Are we going to feed? I'm so thirsty." One cried out.

He held up a hand. "I am not positive, but I'm sure it must be soon."

Maria came into the room, her presence was undeniable. He could feel her lust for him, but he ignored it. He wanted no part in her like that, the thought of her that way made him sick. He looked out over the group of vampires and found his friend Peter standing in it looking back at him. He walked to him quickly, anything to get him away from Maria so that he could avoid her touch. She was full of hate, full of greed. She always wanted more, and he knew why she had come in here and he did not want to go through this again. When would it end? When would she finally just stop all of this? He would have to kill soon, he would have to see the faces of those he trained looking at him with shock, and he would feel their feelings of betrayal, their last hate for him.

"Jasper… come with me." Maria said, beckoning him towards her.

He looked at Peter and saw his look of concern. Peter knew what would be coming soon as well, and Jasper followed Maria out of the room. She turned to him as they walked, winding her arm through his. "My love, I have a task for you."

Jasper's jaw tightened. He knew it had been coming. "What is it that you need me to do?"

Her hand reached for his face, and instinctively he jerked away quickly. Maria frowned, her eyes narrowing on him. She knew he didn't want her, but she kept trying all the same. "We need to kill those who are losing their newborn strength. We are going to need to create more soon. There is a battle coming, and I need to be strong. We must be prepared. If you could please…"

"Who this time?"

Maria listed many names and he knew what would come next. Jasper walked out of the room silently after she had given him the list and he knew he needed to go in search of them. His own feeling of hate flowed through him, consuming him. He could not stand doing this, the feelings that would roll through him when doing this task were indescribable, and nobody could understand how he carried those feelings with him, always feeling responsible for what happened even if he wasn't. He only wished, once again, that this had never happened to him. There was nothing he could do to change it now.

One by one he killed those that had been on the list with the assistance of his friend Peter. He knew that it was unfair, he had been here so long now and Maria still refused to kill him. He had long lost his newborn strength, but he had proven to be worthy of staying, useful, and there was no way she could ever dream of killing him. The thought of being useful only made him jealous of every single newborn that walked into the room to meet their fate. He would have given anything to be one of them, to be able to end this life he never wanted. A female walked into the room and he sighed, these were the hardest for him. It was engrained in him not to harm women, and here she was young and beautiful, new to this life only a while ago, and now he would end it for her. Peter was unusually tense beside him, fear coming from him.

She looked scared, she felt scared. His stomach tightened at the fear that she was projecting to him as well. "Ah, Charlotte…" He whispered.

She hissed. "Don't think that I don't know what is happening Jasper Whitlock."

"Relax Charlotte, there is no need for you to be afraid." He said, walking towards her calming her fear. She could not fight the calm spreading through her, but the panic in her eyes was evident. Her eyes wide and glowing red, not taking her eyes off of any move that he made.

"Whatever you're going to do to me, I'm begging that you don't."

"Charlotte, you have not the slightest clue what I am about to do… why are you pleading for me to stop right now?" He kept getting closer to her, and she tried to continue backing away from his advance.

Her eyes darted over to Peter, and the look stopped him. That was not a look of terror of what Peter was about to do, it was a look of pleading, a look of… no… it could not be. He turned to look at Peter who stood frozen where he had left him. How could he have missed it? They had been so careful not to let anyone know, and he had completely overlooked it wallowing in his own self pity.

"Peter, come, we must do this and be done with it. I am not sure how much more I can handle if we take much longer." He said.

Suddenly Peter rushed to Charlotte grabbing her and blocking her from Jasper. He growled. "You can't hurt her… I will NOT let you… I am very sorry Jasper."

For a moment Jasper just stood there eyes looked with Peter. He had been his only shot at some form of sanity in this nightmare, and he would have never thought he would be looking back at his friend as he fought to protect someone else. Jasper had no intentions to kill Peter, not his friend, he couldn't do it no matter how hard he tried to fulfill his duty.

Peter and Charlotte ran out of the room leaving Jasper standing there. He could not believe what had happened, but at the same time he did not want to stop Peter and Charlotte. He didn't care where they went so long as it was far away from this, far away from this life. They loved each other, he could feel it, he could feel the trust she had in him the moment he rushed to her side to protect her. How had he missed it? Peter had been uncharacteristically tense the entire process.

Jasper had the next person in and continued the process alone. He did not need Peter's help to finish carrying out the orders that were given to him, and quite frankly he didn't think that he would be alive for much longer being that two escaped him. Maria would be angry with him, and finally maybe he could receive the fate that he had wanted so long, maybe he could receive the fate he had handed so many times over. It was his turn, finally.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

A door had opened, she heard it. She also knew someone was in the room, although oddly enough she could not hear the footsteps, but she suddenly felt cold hands grab her from where she lay on the floor and carry her, they set her down on something, a bed? She neither moved, nor talked to whoever it had been that carried her here. She didn't understand how they could even see this bed as there was absolutely no light in the room. How long had she been here? It couldn't have been that long, but she didn't care.

The door opened again, this time she could see faint light pour into the room. A couple of men came in, and she closed her eyes, she didn't want to see them. "We're here to take her."

"Where are you going to take her?" The one who had carried her to the bed asked calmly. She could only tell by the fact that his voice was so close to her.

"We're going to see if we can manage to stop these ridiculous lies of hers. We must treat her." One of the men who had walked into the room replied. She could tell he was still far away from her.

"I do not think it's necessary to do any form of shock treatment right now. Give her a moment. I believe she is in a state of shock from what has happened to her so far."

"State of shock or not, we have orders to take this girl and start treatment immediately."

"Has the family approved all of this?" The one next to her asked.

There was a cold laugh from one of the men that were standing in the room. "It doesn't matter anymore the family is holding a funeral for her tomorrow. It's already been planned ahead of time. They are going to publically acknowledge the death of their daughter. Poor thing, she has no family anymore."

Although she could shut her eyes and ignore anything that was happening physically around her, she could not prevent herself from hearing what she had just heard. Her family was disowning her, and she didn't even know. She would never see her sister again, it had all been a lie. She wondered if her sister would remember her as only she ever got to see. Mary and her sister together were so much different than what her parents may have remembered of her. They only ever saw that their daughter Mary had a problem, they never saw how close the sisters had been, or how they acted towards each other. Her stomach churned making her sick, but there was nothing in her system, fortunately. Her heart wrenched from the facts she now had to face. When she was being taken away she couldn't imagine being anymore alone than going through this by herself… she had been so wrong. Now she truly had nobody, and nobody would ever be searching for her.

"That is heartless."

Another cold laugh filled the room. "Yes, well, that's what happens to little mental cases such as this one. It's a shame she's so young."

The other man laughed. "A lot of them are young, let's get this over with."

Arms grabbed her and lifted her off the bed roughly, no, it wasn't the same cold and gentle arms as before. She kept her eyes closed as she was carried unknowingly to wherever they were taking her. She didn't want to see, and she didn't want to know. She could feel herself being strapped in, and whatever her body was touching was cold. She felt straps secure her arms and legs and she couldn't stop her lip from quivering in the fear of what was to come. She still refused to look and see what was happening. She did not want to know because she was afraid if she did open her eyes and see it she would be even more terrified of what was about to happen to her, and she didn't care to give that satisfaction to her captors. She couldn't understand why her family had done this to her, let her be tortured while leaving her alone for the rest of her life.

Suddenly she felt sharp pain running through her body, a scream escaped through her lips. The pain continued for some time, and soon her body could handle no more and she fell limp. She did not feel the cold fingers feeling for her pulse once the pain had stopped. She was alive, somehow, but she didn't even know. Her body was fighting a fight that her mind had already given up. He placed her lightly in the bed, and he ran to find some form of food for her. They were supposed to kill her, they were supposed to torture her until she died, but he could not understand her family's need for that. He was a stranger to her, and she would probably never know him, but he refused to let her die, she would survive this, and he would get her out of here somehow. One way or another she would be free again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"How DARE you let those selfish traitors run away! You should have just killed her! You should have killed HIM! Have I taught you nothing? Have I made the wrong decision by keeping you?" She screamed, and her palm cracked across his face.

Jasper neither moved, nor flinched. He had taken worse in battle, his body was proof of that with its many scars. He only stood there in the middle of the floor remaining stoic. He could feel her anger, and he knew that she wanted to kill him, and he held onto that hope that maybe she would come to that conclusion. It seemed as though maybe she was getting there slowly.

"SAY SOMETHING!" She screamed into his face.

He looked back into her face. "What is it that you want me to say?"

"You are SORRY! You meant to kill them! You WANTED to kill them!"

"I did mean to kill Charlotte, that was the task you gave me, but I did not WANT to kill either of them. I am not sorry for letting them have a life outside of this, a life with no war." Jasper replied.

The angry sound that came from her filled the room so loudly he would not have been surprised if windows would have broken, had there been windows in this room. "YOU BASTARD!" She growled and hissed at him. There was a pause and she rushed at him grabbing handfuls of his shirt.

Jasper closed his eyes. It would end soon, she would not be able to control her anger much longer. He waited for it to come, he waited for the darkness, the end, to envelop him. When nothing happened he opened his eyes to see her watching him curiously.

"You do not care if I kill you right now." It was not meant to be a question, it was a statement because she had finally realized an important piece of information. She laughed then. "Well, Mr. Whitlock, as punishment you can go and find some new humans for me to change. Bring them to me. You can go without feeding for quite some time and deal with the thirst that will consume you, and you… my dear… will be the one killing every single vampire once they lose their newborn strength… and you will do it alone. Nobody will be there to help clear your conscious. I hope you enjoy your new punishment. Maybe you will come to see just how fortunate you are. LEAVE ME now. I want some newborns."

Jasper turned and walked out of the room, fury was eating him alive. Not only was it Maria's fury with him, but his own fury for having to accept that he was still here, he was not dead how he longed so badly to be. Now he would have to suffer for being so easily read by his maker. He should have made himself appear to be afraid, and he would remember that for the future. He would make sure that if the opportunity came for him to die by the hand of Maria again he would let it happen. He was no coward, however, he knew very well that every time they went into battle he could never come to terms with allowing himself to die. If anyone was going to kill him it would be Maria, and it would be because he stood up for something he believed, not because he hated this life so much that he would just give up and let some newborns from another army kill him when they were nowhere near as skilled as he was.

He ran outside into the open air. It was dark outside, and the farther he ran from where they hid the closer he got to the scent of humans. He could feel the burning take over, he was about to lose control. If he just drank from one Maria wouldn't have to know… but then he would have to hide the body well. He growled at the thought, and continued running, he would find Maria some newborns after all. Maybe soon she would change her mind and he would still get the end he wanted.

Jasper stopped running and stood still for a moment. He wondered how far Peter and Charlotte had gotten from this place, and if they would be okay. He wasn't sure that they knew how to live a life outside of fighting like they had for such a long time. He couldn't help but hope that maybe they would have a happy and quiet life together, and that they would not have to deal with all of the battles. Maybe someday he would even be able to see them again, and he would not regret ever having let them go. At this time he didn't regret it, he felt an entirely different feeling, one he hadn't known since he had still been human. He felt jealousy. He wished that maybe it had been him that had the opportunity to run away, but he knew it would be impossible to do.

Weeks passed very much like they had before Peter and Charlotte ever became part of their army. Battles continued, he gained more scars, and he killed many others that he had trained to become such good fighters. He kept living day to day in the emotions of those around him with the constant hate brewing inside. It was killing him inside to feel so much hate from others that it was becoming his own. He hated himself, he hated the situation he was in, and he hated those around him. Jasper did not allow himself to become close to anymore of the new vampires around him. He did not want to go through anything like what had happened with Peter. He let himself gain a friend, or at least some semblance of a friendship it was the closest thing to a friend he'd had since he had been human, and in the end that friend ended up leaving him to deal with this situation alone. Peter was never aware of Jasper's feelings about their lifestyle, but somehow he knew Peter could sense it. They had a mutual understanding, as Jasper knew Peter's constant feelings.

He spent as much time alone and away from others as he could. The more he secluded himself the more he was able to think clearly without so much hate filling him. Maria kept a watchful eye on him, and she kept him restricted as to when he was allowed to hunt, and she had kept her word on the fact that he would kill everyone who had passed their newborn time, and that he would do it alone. He was also the one who would be picking the new ones to join their army, and he couldn't stop the regret he had every time a human saw him from afar at first. He could feel their wonderment, the way they stared at him with need, or amazement. They all thought the same, he was beautiful, and then he would get closer to them and despite his ability to keep them calm he could still feel the fear that was fighting the forced calm.

Maria walked towards him as he sat alone in the empty room. "You… I need more newborns, go find some for me."

Jasper looked up at her. "I have a name…"

"You're not worthy of being called by any other name than traitor. Now go."

"How long are you going to remain angry with me?" He asked.

She glared at him. "I will be angry with you for as long as I WANT to be angry with you. Now, go find me newborns."

"I'm not sure it's such a good idea to send me out after these newborns, you know that I have no self-control over them. You're forcing me not to hunt, and human blood around me… I wouldn't be able to control myself if I wanted to."

Maria gave him a long and hard stare. "Find a way to control yourself vampire, for if I find that you have had even a slight drink from any human… well, I'm sure I could find worse punishments for you."

Jasper growled low and deep in his throat, and he walked past her and out into the clear night without saying a word. He was glad to be away from the rest of the army as it allowed him to completely detach himself from the feelings that they were forcing him to feel. He ran off at full speed just enjoying the feel of the wind on his face and the usual night silence that was only interrupted by living creatures.

Suddenly he stopped as he heard, "Jasper!" It was no louder than a whisper, but he knew that voice anywhere.

He turned to find Peter standing behind him. "Peter? What are you doing here?"

"I came to tell you thank you… for not killing us even though you should have."

The jealousy hit him like a wall. Peter was okay, and his face no longer held the signs of the stressful, hateful environment that they had been so accustomed to. "I couldn't kill you. I didn't even want to kill you, and of course I never wanted to kill Charlotte, but I would have as it was my orders."

"Charlotte understands, she's just grateful that you didn't follow through, or have us hunted." Peter stated.

"I don't know if Maria is hunting for you or not, so I would suggest staying far away from here. Here, let's walk." Jasper said, as they continued walking away from the newborn army.

"How has it been Jasper? You look… horrible." Peter stated.

Jasper's black eyes fell on Peter's face, noting that Peter's eyes were glowing red, and he looked healthy. "That is because I feel about the same."

"How long are you going to put up with that life? You know that Charlotte and I would take you with us. She is ever so grateful for what you've allowed us to do. We have a life… please… join us…"


	2. Chapter 2

Two

Another breath. Another second. Another minute. Another day, surely. She didn't know what day it was, how much time had passed since she had been here. She only knew the sounds of the door being opened, the voices of her captors, and the feeling of the pain they inflicted on her. She still wouldn't fight back, partly over the fact that she was starving, and although she had an angel among them he could only smuggle her so much food without anyone realizing that anything was happening.

She lay shivering on the floor… or was it the bed? It didn't matter what it was anymore, she only knew she was freezing and the thin, and poor excuse for clothing that covered her skin didn't help much of anything. The door to her room opened at that moment and she bit her lip to stop the sound of her teeth chattering together. She squeezed her eyes shut knowing this had to be another one of her torture sessions. Her body curled up tight as she bit her lip harder in anticipation of being jerked up.

"Alice… are you okay?"

Alice… that meant it was the nice man. He always called her Alice, not Mary. She didn't mind. It seemed as though Mary was gone forever. Her happy childhood days were over, and she would never again know what it was like to be how she was then. The empty ache inside her made her stomach churn and she almost became sick on the floor again, although she still wasn't sure if she was on the bed or the floor. She no longer had a family, nobody to support her or save her from the pain inflicted on her. She couldn't understand why her body hadn't given up yet, and why was it still fighting to stay alive. She knew that mentally she wasn't winning this battle she prayed every single time it would be the last time her body would withstand this treatment, that this would be the day where it finally ended, and she would not be able to open her eyes to the blackness that surrounded her daily.

"Alice?" The whisper came again.

She never spoke to him. Every single time he would come in and sit silently with her trying to make sure that she was still surviving. His ice cold fingers pressed against her wrist. She could barely tell the difference between the temperature of his fingers and how cold she actually was. She didn't even flinch at his touch thinking how it was mean that even the staff was so cold, surely they didn't need to freeze those that worked in this horrible place as well as those they held captive.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"No worries, the thirst will go away, you will see." Charlotte commented and they left the house quickly,

Nobody knew they were going, only that they were, and as they drove for what seemed like forever, only stopping for gas and to hunt again Jasper felt himself ease only slightly. Maria would never find him again, and surely the Volturi would step in and handle her army especially now that he was gone. He wondered if she had even noticed his extended absence yet, and if she was going to send others after him only to realize that his scent left no trail after a certain distance, and they wouldn't know where to find him afterwards. Soon he would no longer be Jasper Whitlock. He would find a new identity and live as though he never existed.

Days later Jasper found himself in a house that was in a completely different place, a state he knew wasn't much in his human day and age. None of them had ever mentioned, or talked about coming this way therefore nobody had anything to trail them with. Jasper looked out of the window thinking about how alone he still felt. He would need to hunt soon because he had been trying to stay away from human blood as long as possible hoping maybe it would be easier if he didn't kill as often. The feelings of his victims still ate away at him, and he could help feeling the disgust rising inside of himself again at the thought of how many had fallen prey to him, and their fear at the realization of what he was, and the fact they were about to die.

Peter walked up behind Jasper and looked out of the same window. "Rainy day outside."

Jasper turned to look at Peter and nodded. "It is."

"You can go out in the rain… nobody will notice any difference in your skin aside from the fact that you're pale, but it won't make much of a difference. They won't care about you being as pale as you are… just stay far enough for them not to see your red eyes…"

He shook his head. "I'm not comfortable with the idea of going out in the public near humans in the daylight. I can wait until tonight… then I will hunt."

Peter laid a gentle hand on Jasper's shoulder. "You cannot keep denying your thirst. You will be of no help to yourself that way. Go out, get a decent hunt in. Don't worry so much about the people that you drink from, it's necessary for you."

He shook his head. "If only this had never happened a poor innocent person would not have to be hurt, or killed by me. How I wish things had turned out differently."

"But they didn't, so try and make the best of this situation. You can have a life… your own life away from the war down south, and happy. Maybe you would find someone that you could love as I have."

Jasper's face had lost all remnants of civility. He was furious as he stood almost nose to nose with Peter. "Nobody could possibly love me… love THIS… I'm a monster of the worst kind. You and Charlotte are not nearly as bad as I am, but there is nobody out there who could look at me whether they're a vampire or not, and agree that they love me."

"Oh Jasper, you don't know that for certain." Charlotte stated as she answered the room. "You put so much blame on yourself for the horrible things that happened in the war. You must let yourself see some reason. You are not the monster that you say you are, if you were Peter and I would not be standing here in front of you… you would have killed us by now…"

He shook his head, as if he didn't want to believe the words that Peter and Charlotte were genuinely saying to him. "I need some air, I'll be back later."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Her body was lifted from where she lay and she knew it was time. She kept her eyes shut, refusing to open them to the reality of the situation that was about to enfold again. She felt the routine that always took place happen around her. How could one human's body handle so much torture? Surely there would be a point in time where the body would finally give in to the torture and would cease to keep living. She didn't want to feel this pain anymore. She felt somewhat fortunate as she knew her body was weaker than it had been on that first day, but she still felt strong enough, as though she could take another one of these torturous sessions and live to see another unmeasured time in that black room.

The sharp pain coursed through her body and a scream tore from her. The pain in her throat from the screaming went unnoticed again as the torture she was receiving overrode any other pitiful pain she could have possibly been feeling. She cried out for it to stop, she couldn't stop herself from screaming out that she would stop having any visions if only they would stop the pain. She could faintly hear the sounds of someone's laughter at her begging request, and she felt the pain intensify for only a split moment before the blackness took over her senses. Her body collapsed and she was not awake to feel the kind doctor pick her up with ease while he scolded the others for their sick treatment of her. She was far too fragile for the amount of torture they were putting her through, and he understood that. The doctor was impressed by the fact that she was still breathing after yet another session.

He set her down gently on the bed in her room. He waited with her hoping that she would revive soon. When she did not wake for quite some time he rushed to sneak her some decent food from his lunch. He would not be eating it, and she had more use for the food than he did. He snuck back into her room again and waited for quite some time until she finally woke up and when she did, she only lay right where she was, shivering.

"Alice, here… I brought you some food." He carefully moved her into an upright position and placed the food in her lap.

She looked in his direction, the darkness not allowing her to see his face, she had never seen his face, but from the sounds of his voice he sounded beautiful. She wished she could tell him that she didn't want to live, but she felt so grateful for his kindness in all of this that she was afraid if she did he would no longer make this painful process any easier for her. If she were going to die from this she would rather it be with this angel still around than be alone, more alone than she already was.

Reluctant as she was to eat the food she began devouring it as quickly as possible because she was starving, and her body was well aware of that. "Eat slowly, or you're going to make yourself sick… and the others suspicious."

She nodded and forced herself with all of her willpower to take smaller bites, and actually chew her food. While she sat eating her food she began to wonder how she could have possibly let herself become this way. She was an animal. She shook the thoughts from her mind and continued eating. Again, she never spoke to the man who sat silently with her, but she appreciated his company nonetheless.

Suddenly there were loud noises coming from outside her door. She wondered what was going on to cause so much commotion. The man in the room with her spoke, "I have to go, Alice, but remember eat slowly… and I will be back soon."

His voice had come from the opposite side of the room, it sounded like. How could he possibly have gotten over there? She didn't hear or feel him get up and walk across the room. The door to her room opened allowing for a little light to spill in the room, but her eyes could not adjust fast enough to catch the mysterious man who continued to help her.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The wind was picking up and blowing strands of blond hair into his eyes. The smell of human blood taking over his senses, he looked around in the direction in which the wind had carried the scent. Standing alone was a woman who was looking at the river, arms wrapped around herself as she stared into the moving water not even paying him any mind. She was careless for not paying any mind to him, but then again not every person was thinking of murdering the innocent for the simple fact of draining them of blood. He would be able to get her fast enough that she wouldn't even realize what was going on.

Her emotions at the moment were frustrating to him because she was obviously having a rough day as she was very upset. He tried his best to tune her emotions out, and in turn attempted to soothe her. Once her emotions seemed to have calmed he silently and swiftly made his attack. There was nobody else around to witness this attack, and it only took but a moment for him to pounce on her and soon he felt his thirst easing away. He was careful about everything he did as to make sure that nobody would ever know who could have possibly killed this woman.

As soon as it was over, although he felt stronger, when he looked down upon the woman's face he felt a sick feeling take over. He truly was a monster, one that would never be able to change this fact about himself. He would be murdering humans for the rest of his immortal existence. He would never be able to be around a human again without wanting to kill them, and more than likely following through on that craving. This was an innocent person, someone who had a family, someone who had a life he didn't know about, and he just destroyed it without a second thought.

He stumbled back away from the lifeless body and ran in the opposite direction back to the house. He should have never left. Had he remained in the house instead of running away this woman could still be alive. The news will spread about her death and soon he will feel the full impact of the damage he had just caused on some person's family. Jasper walked toward the house and immediately let himself fall back on the large cushioned chair sitting closest to the door. Peter and Charlotte seemed to have left the house empty and he drew in a deep breath and exhaled.

The door opened to the house and Jasper automatically knew that both Peter and Charlotte had arrived. "Is everything all right, Jasper?" Charlotte asked.

He remained silent.

"Jasper, what's wrong?" She pressed again, walking over to him and sitting down next to him on the arm of the chair. "Please, if there is any way that we can make this easier for you, then let us know so we can help you. You are our friend, and we don't want you to be so upset. This was supposed to be a better life for you."

"I need some time… I need to adjust… I'm sure that this will all get better for me." Jasper replied.

Peter and Charlotte kept their eyes on him for what seemed like hours before Peter finally said, "What happened when you left earlier?"

Jasper growled his hand grabbed a vase that was sitting on the table in front of him and he threw it at a wall before either Peter, nor Charlotte could react. The crystal shattered into the tiniest of pieces from the force, and it came flying back out towards them falling short of where Charlotte and Jasper remained sitting. She put a hand on his shoulder in a move to attempt to comfort him.

"I found a woman at the river. I wasn't even trying to find anyone. She was someone who happened across my path, and she was there at the wrong moment in time. She did not even know I was there, and I took her life from her… I… am a monster… I'm a killer of innocent people!" Jasper sat forward his elbows resting on his legs and his hand hidden in his hands.

"Oh, Jasper, you have to drink from them to stay strong… there's nothing you can do about that. If you don't feed you could kill more than just one person…"

His face came up from his hands and his crimson eyes held Charlotte's as he spit out his next words, "Don't you see it… DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?! I don't WANT this life! I don't WANT to kill an innocent woman because I thirst for HER BLOOD! This is not a life! How many years will I have to continue this… this… HELL before it ENDS?!"

Peter stepped forward now and calmly said, "Jasper… would you rather be here or would you rather go back to Maria and live the life you did there?"

Jasper stopped talking and thought for a moment. This life was nowhere near as horrible as his past with Maria. He had no intentions of ever returning to her, and he never wanted to take part in another vampire war again, or any war for that matter. He had had enough of fighting and killing, granted he would never be able to avoid the killing aspect because he knew that would never change so long as he required blood to sustain his miserable existence.

"You're right… this is an improvement."

"I'm sorry that you had to be changed, and that you ended up with this life, but there is nothing that I can do to change that. No matter that, I will still not let you end your existence merely because you cannot handle the simple fact that we must feed from humans. Jasper, now is the time that you get over your pity, and your pain and begin to live the life you were given. Come Charlotte, let's leave him be for a while so that he can think about the things that we have told him."

Charlotte rose slowly from her seat next to him, she seemed as though she were going to say something, but then decided against it, and followed Peter out of the room. Jasper laid his head against the back of the seat staring up at the ceiling, he closed his eyes and hoped that there was something better to this life of his. There had to be something better…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Things were happening around her so fast these days she was unsure what to make of it all. It had been days since she had seen the doctor that always helped her and she was beginning to wonder if he had finally given up on her and decided not to waste his efforts on her. She was a lost cause. Every single day that she remained in her dark room she grew weaker and weaker. She felt as though her memory was getting worse. She could hardly remember anything about her family. She had a family right? Surely, she had to have some sort of family because she would not exist if she didn't have one at some point.

Where was she anyway?

Her hands reached around her to try to touch anything that wasn't the object she was laying on at that moment. Her eyes strained to see something… anything… but there was only black. She whimpered, and the sound of her voice made her jump. How long had it been since he heard a sound come out of herself that weren't screams as a result of the pain. Her memory seemed to recall the intense pain that she was being put through, but that was almost everything she could remember. A growl came from the other side of the door, and she did not understand what could possibly have made that sound. All was silent outside of her room for a short while until her door opened and shut quickly, before the door was even fully open she closed her eyes tightly hoping that she would be forgotten.

"Alice." The voice whispered, and gentle cold hands touched her. "Alice, please… I know you must be weak… but I need you to try and be strong. I'm going to try and save you. There's, well, something bad has gotten into the building and I need to make sure that you are safe, do you understand?"

His face must have been close to hers, she thought, she could smell his sweet scent. She had never smelled something so sweet as him. He must be an angel, she thought to herself, only an angel could smell so beautiful, sound so beautiful…

"I KNOW YOU'RE HIDING FROM ME… I KNOW YOU ARE!!!" A voice outside her room yelled angrily.

She tried to force her body to move, but she couldn't, she couldn't move anything she was so weak. Her angel would be so upset to see her fail him. His hands reached for her and lifted her effortlessly from where she lay. She wanted to be able to stand for herself, but she honestly could not remember the last time she stood on her own without being dragged.

The door to her room burst open and bright light poured into the room from outside. Her eyes burned from the intensity of white light that was streaming into her room at that moment. The light didn't quite reach them, but it was enough that if her eyes could only adjust she would be able to look upon the face of her savior. A strange growl came from the direction of the door. It sounded as though he inhaled as well.

"Ah, is this your pet?"

"You know she is no pet…"

"I will never understand how you can make a connection with a human without killing it, but this one… ah, but she smells DIVINE! I must taste her…"

"No! Do not touch her!" The man holding her cried out.

His grip around her tightened and she felt the force of someone trying to grab her, and then she felt herself flying through the air, and fell in a heap on the floor. She lost consciousness for a while. She was out long enough to miss the fight that ensued after she had been flung through the air. When she regained consciousness she was alone with the man she had come to look upon as her savior.

"Alice we must act fast… there is no other way… what I'm going to do is going to be painful, and it may be painful for many days, but try… try to be strong. This is the only way for me to save you. I'm so sorry…" He muttered. "If you don't want me to do this… Alice, is it okay? May I save you?"

For the first time since she had been under his care she said something. "Yes." The word was so weak, but if he wanted to save her then surely it could not be so bad or painful as he says.

He cradled her in his lap for a moment and his face dipped down to her neck. He inhaled sharply, and when he exhaled his icy breath hit her skin making her shiver. Suddenly he bit into her neck, her eyes flew open and before she could react to this action he was across the room from her holding a hand to his nose and mouth. The pain was almost instant as the fire under her skin spread and intensified. This was nothing like the pain that she had experienced before… this was far more excruciating she could not see how she would survive. She only wanted to die so as not to have to feel this pain.

The man who had been taking care of her, her savior, her angel… no, he could not possibly be those things and still cause her pain like this. This was beyond pain, beyond torture, there was no word that could describe this feeling. She cried out from the intensity of the pain. As she cried out she faintly heard someone yelling.

"NO! NOOOOOO! You're changing her… YOU'VE BITTEN HER SHE'S RUINED!"

"I couldn't let you kill her."

"YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS! YOU'VE RUINED HER!" There were faint sounds of banging, things breaking around her. She could hardly focus on everything happening around her.

She was blinded by the white hot pain that had taken over her entire body, and soon everything went black again, and she was no longer conscious.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The days were all passing by with much of the same routine every single day. Jasper had finally gotten just a bit more used to going out during the daytime on the days where the clouds seemed to take over the sky. Today happened to be one of those days, the sky seemed to be threatening to open up and allow for a heavy rain. Jasper was standing outside with his back against a tree and looking up at the sky as if he were only waiting for it to just start raining.

"Jasper, have you hunted lately?" Peter asked from the doorway of the house where Charlotte stood right behind him.

"Oh… it's been a couple of days…" Jasper answered, "Why do you ask?"

"I know that you haven't hunted for more than just a couple of days, and I was only wondering because Charlotte and myself were thinking of going for a hunt later tonight if you would come with us…"

Jasper was thinking of ways to refuse, but the thirst he had been avoiding was clawing at his throat and he decided it would be safer to just accept the offer and join them rather than come up with another excuse to be left alone he forced a smile on his face.

"I'll go with the two of you tonight. Maybe this time you two can control me a little better than I can control myself."

Charlotte shook her head and seemed to be holding back a comment that she was ready to say. As for Peter his face only showed a split second of his frustration before he was calm again on his own. "I wish you would have a little more faith in yourself Jasper."

"Oh, maybe someday…"

"Well, tonight we go hunting, be ready as soon as the sun goes down." Peter said, turning back into the house.

Jasper leaned his head back against the tree again and looked back up at the sky. It was getting darker and he was beginning to feel that the weather was starting to agree with his mood. The thought almost made him laugh. He stopped and his eyes fell to the ground. He couldn't even remember the last time that he laughed, it seemed like an act that was virtually impossible… it was a faint memory deep back in the corners of his mind of things long forgotten. He groaned slid down to the ground covering his face with his hands.

He had lost his grasp on humanity. No longer was killing people morally wrong, but a matter of sustenance for him. He still hated the rush of fear and despair that flooded him as he fed from his prey. He wondered what it would be like to be happy again, it was a feeling he no longer understood first hand. Experiencing a short-lived happiness from someone he was about to kill did not allow him to appreciate the feeling. He could never quite miss the feeling, as it had been so long since he felt anything other than anger, or any other negative emotion that came from a being around him.

The sky slowly got darker as night began to creep up on the day. Jasper heard the door open and he knew that it was time for him to move. The realization of what he was about to do, along with all the emotions that he was about to experience both his and not his own. He rose from where he had been sitting since he slid to the ground hours before. Peter and Charlotte were standing next to him, both with encouraging smiles on their faces.

"Shall we?" Peter asked.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The pain was slowly easing, she began to gain consciousness and suddenly she saw a face. This face was not one she recognized, but she didn't care. He was beautiful. She could feel the pain subside, but still she refused to open her eyes in fear of losing the image that was haunting her mind at that moment. His eyes were dark, his face looked slightly tormented, the look on his face making her wish she could reach out and hold him, try to console him. He was pale, with beautiful golden hair. He was unlike anything she had ever seen before. Somehow, she knew she had never seen him before, but she knew him, she knew who he was…

Eyes closed, she began to notice the sounds around her that seemed to ring inside of her ears. So many different sounds were flooding her senses that she wondered where she could possibly be that so many things were happening and she could hear it all. She flexed her fingers first, and then after realizing she was indeed still alive, her eyes fluttered open realizing that the room she was in was dark. Something was odd despite the fact that it was dark she could see everything clearly as if it were daytime.

She moved to sit up, the movement happened in a split second and her eyes widened. She was beginning to feel uncomfortable when she realized that she was holding her breath. She inhaled deeply and screamed out in pain when a feeling equivalent of a fire in her throat overcame every other feeling she was having. The fire that she felt in her throat was awkward it was not a burn that was associated so much with pain as with…

"I'm so thirsty…" She whispered, jumping slightly at the sound of her voice. It sounded so musical. It was as if she were singing instead of speaking. She tried as hard as she could to remember how she ended up here.

She looked around noticing a letter sitting next to her, picking it up she unfolded it and began reading.

_Dear Alice,_

_I'm not sure what you're going to remember when you wake up, and I apologize that I will not be there to guide you. I know that you are wondering what has happened, and I am writing this right now before I die to explain to you what I can. You are a vampire. Most people would not believe those words, but it is true. That is what I am… what I was, by the time you read this._

_There are a few things you need to know, that thirst that you're feeling at this very moment. You must be careful. You must give yourself some space, far away from any humans. That is why I brought you here, where I could hide you… I needed you to be away from where you were, away from all the easy victims. You have to remember that you cannot kill any person. There is a way to survive without killing anyone. Somehow, I know that you will be fine. There are clothes for you… you will see, right next to you. I'm sorry I don't have more than just that to give you for now._

_You have to understand that this was the only way that I could save you, and although you might not have wanted to live… although you might have preferred an end to the life that you had… I could not do that to you. I could not just let you die…_

The letter ended with that. Her name was Alice. At least she knew this much, and now she could go on at least having some identity. She changed quickly and soon found herself standing in the doorway to the house overlooking fields and fields of grass, in front of the house stood one tree, tall and strong. As she looked at it she had another vision of the beautiful man she had seen before she opened her eyes to realize what she had become. She knew he was like her, and she knew that she had to find him…


	3. Chapter 3

Three

He was in the study of Peter and Charlotte's newest house. This was third home in almost no time. Jasper had to admit that despite the fact that he was glad that they remained in the northern part of the country, about as far as they could stay away from Maria he did not care for moving around constantly. He had always loved the fact that he had a home when he was human. Jasper may have joined the military, but he did not plan on always being in it, and he had wanted to eventually find a woman, marry her, live in a large beautiful house with tons of land around him. He wanted children, and he wanted a large porch where he could sit with his wife and enjoy the beauty that surrounded them.

Jasper picked a book up from the bookshelf of the previous, now dead, owner of this house. The book titled "Gone With the Wind." He had heard of it before, but he had never read it. He laughed at the idea of actually reading it, but then he looked around him to see he was still alone and he opened it beginning to read it as he stood by the open window of the house, open to a gray sky. He smiled slightly at the memories the book produced at first and shook his head at the ridiculous attitude of Scarlett. He stopped reading after only a moment and sighed closing the book and focusing on the scenery that the outdoors offered him.

How he missed the simpler days of his life, his childhood where everything was carefree. Shaking his head he made his way back to the bookshelves to find something that could entertain him while he waited for Peter and Charlotte to get back from their hunt. He had gone the day before, and when they had asked him if he wanted to go with them again today he couldn't bring himself to agree so he decided to stay home instead, away from anyone and away from unnecessary harm to anybody else. He had killed enough innocent people recently. He tried not to think about the last person that fell victim to his hunting habits. He pulled out a book "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare" and sat down in the large leather armchair.

The front door of the house opened and Peter rushed into the study looking at Jasper. "We're going to have to move…"

"Right now?" Jasper asked, feeling confused at the sense of slight panic that was coming from him. He rose from the armchair, setting the book down gently where he had been sitting.

"Yes, right now… I did something stupid…"

Jasper raised an eyebrow wondering what on earth Peter was talking about. "What did you do?"

"I um… may have drained a… um…"

"Who did you kill?" Jasper asked, his brow furrowed as he looked his friend straight in the eye.

"An important government person for this city." Peter said quickly.

Jasper froze. "You're joking with me…" He didn't need Peter to tell him that he wasn't because he could tell from the way that Peter was feeling that he wasn't lying.

Peter shook his head. "I went through his wallet to grab some money… and he had ID, and it was… Jasper we don't have time to talk, let's go!"

Peter grabbed Jasper's arm and pulled him toward the door. Charlotte was there waiting and as soon as she saw them she swung the door open and ran in a blur out of the door, Jasper and Peter right on her heels. Jasper didn't care what had happened so long as they got out of there before anyone found out where Peter had hidden the body of this person.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Her eyes looked distant as she saw an image of a family… yes they were a family. She would be meeting them, and living with them. The only problem was that she didn't know their names yet. She only saw this family in her mind for a second, and hoped that maybe someday she would be able to find out who this family actually was, but until then she continued her trip in search of the one in her visions. The one whom she knew she needed most desperately to meet. She remembered seeing a sign of her running towards Philadelphia. She had no idea why she might be running that way in particular, but she hoped that maybe that was her sign that would bring her closer to him.

She had been trying, with much difficulty at times, to steer clear of any human contact, but she had quickly found out that there were certain things about her that were just not normal to the human eye. For one, she had realized quickly that being out in the sun and around humans would not be a good idea, and fortunately for her she had a tendency of knowing what the weather was going to be wherever she was which made it very easy for her to avoid being out whenever the weather was nice, and it also made it easy for her to avoid any place where the weather may be bright and beautiful.

Alice had nothing else to look forward to, and nothing else to occupy her mind as she still couldn't remember who she had been before this. She was beginning to wonder if she was ever going to find out the truth about her past and her history. Part of her was wondering if she really wanted to know her human life at all, there must have been a reason for her not being able to remember a single memory aside from complete and utter darkness. That was all she could seem to produce…

Alice stopped for a moment looking up at the clear night sky, and then looked back down at her clothes. She had managed to gain a small collection of money that kept growing with time, and still managed to buy clothes for herself trying to use the same set of clothes for as long as possible before spending any money on any others. She had to keep what she was carrying to a minimum. It had been years, she had been living alone and never settling down in one place, and as much as she wanted to see the man that was in her visions she knew that it hadn't been time, no clues of where he could be had come up until now, and even then she wasn't completely certain if this would lead her to him.

All she had was the hope of seeing him leading her to this unknown place. In the time since she had become a vampire times had changed dramatically. The country was at its worst with the Great Depression and she had found it hard to come about money, and clothes at first, but began using her ability to get the things that she needed in order to survive. She, however, could not say that she hadn't slipped and killed any humans. In the first few years especially there had been times where in her carefulness to avoid any human contact one would come across her path when she was waiting to hunt, extremely thirsty, and then before she knew it she had killed someone. These things happened, of course, when she hadn't been as careful using her gift the correct way to be as careful as possible not to slip.

Moments like these made her feel horrible to be what she had become, and she was indeed one of the most deceiving of her kind, she was sure. Not because she had the ability to see the future, and although her visions definitely helped her to do some things with little or no effort at all, the most deceiving thing was her appearance. She was so small in comparison to any adults she came across, and many times she had gone in to buy clothes and been told was a very beautiful young lady. It was things like this that only made it easier sometimes for her to get the things that she wanted.

In the mean time since the depression finally ended, and as the economy began to recover she had seen the news of a war in Europe, and then soon thereafter the attack on Pearl Harbor, and the U.S. involvement in the war. She had seen the news of the war's progress, and had seen it come to a close, and was thankful for it. Life began to go back to normal soon after as soldiers returned home and there was no war to worry about anymore.

Alice shook her head coming back to present time. "What day is it again?" She wondered to herself thinking of the last newspaper she had seen telling her what day it had been.

It had been a few days ago when she had last seen any sign of the days. "Oh!" She exclaimed as she remembered. Today would be April 3rd. She remembered now. The year, she knew was 1948. She would reach Philadelphia tonight, she was close she knew this, and then hopefully a vision would lead her to him.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jasper looked around at his surroundings. Surely, he would find a sign of where he might be now. Maybe it would have been a better idea to stay with Peter and Charlotte. His mind raced back to the day where Peter and Charlotte had rushed him out of the study where he had been reading Shakespeare and sitting peacefully.

_He ran after the two wondering how Peter could have been so careless during his hunt. When they were finally a safe distance from the house they had just left they slowed their pace, and Jasper's frustration got the better of him._

_ "What were you thinking, Peter?!" He exclaimed._

_ Charlotte spun around and faced him hissing. "Do not blame this on him, Jasper Whitlock! I know you are no better than him, you slip constantly!"_

_ Peter held up a hand to silence Charlotte. "I had let myself go too long without a proper hunt, and now I am going to pay the price for it. I have killed an important man, someone who I should have known not to touch. I could have exposed us all in my greed for blood all because I thought that I would be fine to wait just a little longer. I'm sorry…"_

_ "I can't keep doing this, Peter! I cannot keep moving from place to place never staying somewhere longer than a few weeks at a time, if that! I do not want to keep running!" Jasper exclaimed._

_ Charlotte growled. "You are being ridiculous and ungrateful! We-"_

_ "CHARLOTTE! ENOUGH!" Peter yelled, his face inches from hers. She stepped away and turned her back on the two men. "We don't have much choice in how we live. We can't afford to stay around in one place so long there are three of us killing humans, the people around here will notice if we stay too long."_

_ Charlotte scoffed, "Not to mention that Jasper cannot go without hunting at least five times in one week!"_

_ "Charlotte, I have warned you once, DO NOT make me WARN YOU AGAIN!"_

_ She whirled around to face them again. "Why? WHY must I be quiet? You know it is true! We have talked about this before! He is dangerous because he cannot control his thirst, and in order to indulge him we move constantly so that we're not found out! The Volturi would come hunting us like the pathetic monsters that we truly are if we allowed ourselves the luxury of staying somewhere for longer than maybe a couple of weeks at the most!"_

_ Peter sighed, looking sympathetically at Jasper. "Why didn't you just tell me that I need to learn to control myself better?" Jasper asked calmly although he felt Charlotte's anger and it was only increasing his own._

_ Peter shook his head and averted his eyes. "How could I tell you to do something like that after all that we have been through? After all that YOU have been through? I know, Jasper, I have been there. WE were there. Our life with Maria is not one that you can leave and immediately adapt to. Charlotte and I have been working to control our thirst for all of these years, decades we've been working at this, and do you see where it has gotten us? We still hunt frequently! It's just that… we know that you were in that lifestyle far longer than us and I respect you far too much to point out something that might appear as a weakness to you."_

_ "IT IS HIS WEAKNESS!" Charlotte screamed._

_ Jasper kept silent for a moment taking deep breaths before he acted on the feelings that were flooding his senses in overload between Charlotte, Peter, and himself. "I already know my weakness, Peter. I live with it everyday, and resent myself for it. If there were anything that I could do to change this I would, but you know that it is not so easy to kill yourself once you've become this, and as much as I would love to have the strength to walk into a fire I could never bring myself to do that. So, no, I have to live with what I am forever… and live knowing that I will NEVER be able to control what I am… I will be killing innocent people… I will have to keep feeling their emotions, their dread, their despair, their anguish… the fear, and at the same time their wonder at what I am… It torments me like you would never believe because you only know what it feels to kill them! You do not know what it is like to feel what they are feeling…"_

_ Peter stepped toward Jasper, and Charlotte covered her mouth with her hand. Her anger changed to regret. She knew it was hard for Jasper in more ways than one, but she had let her emotions take control, forgetting about Jasper's ability. "Jasper, I know…" Peter began to say._

_ He shook his head. "No, you don't know, and I realize that now. You will never understand why I am how I am. You will never understand the torture that I go through, and you won't understand how much I have gone through before you even came into this life, before you were part of Maria's army. I am not upset that you can't possibly understand… I only envy that you and Charlotte can live this life so easily, and I wish that I had that same option."_

_ "I'm sorry…" Both Charlotte and Peter said simultaneously._

_ "I think that it is time that I leave the two of you. It is time that I go off and live this life alone. I cannot continue to burden the two of you with how I am…"_

_ "Jasper, it's unnecessary for you to do this."_

_ "Don't do this because I said those things. You know that I respect you, and had it not been for you we would still be living a terrible existence with Maria, or rather, I would be dead." Charlotte explained._

_ "No, I thank you for letting me stay with you as long as you have… but my time with you has reached it's end. It is time that I learn to live on my own. I'm sure that we'll come across each other again, but until then… I can only say thank you, and that I am sorry for what I have done."_

_ With that Jasper turned in a direction he was uncertain of where he was going and ran. He ignored the calls of Peter and Charlotte for him to stop, and ran as fast as he could knowing they were pursuing him for some time until they realized that he had meant what he had said and stopped._

Jasper inhaled deeply as he focused on his current surroundings again. He had no idea where he was at the moment, and it had been a while since his last seeing Peter and Charlotte. He didn't know how they were, or if everything was okay. Things had not changed much for him in the sense that his thirst was still just has difficult to control as it had been before. The only difference was that being alone allowed him more time to stay in one place longer. He realized that all he had to do, if he stayed in one place, was hunt far away from his home. However, after being in his last place alone for a while he felt he soon needed to move, having gotten used to the lifestyle. His new move had brought him to Philadelphia.

He neither liked, nor disliked his new home, and the idea of going outdoors during the day when it was cloudy or raining was still a difficult concept for him. He never felt completely comfortable doing out during the day, although he knew that his secret would not be given away. This day was a rainy day, and he had been trying his hardest to stay far away from civilization, keeping to his house on the outskirts of the city. The problem with this was that his thirst was raging inside of him and he knew if he did not feed soon it could mean trouble for him.

Jasper stared out of the window and growled. "Stop being so ridiculous…"

He turned and grabbed his coat and strolled outside, immediately coming across the scent of a woman who had just walked by. He followed it quickly, and silently catching up soon after. She was completely unaware that anyone was following her at the moment and she pulled her coat tighter around her lean body. Her scent was overwhelming Jasper's senses and he could taste the venom flooding his mouth. The wind blew strongly, the rain hitting Jasper on the side of his face as it fell at an angle, and he could feel it running down his neck and under the collar of his shirt, but at that moment the woman's scarf flew off from around her neck hitting Jasper in the chest.

She spun around preparing to chase it and froze when her eyes landed on Jasper, a blush rising in her cheeks, only making her more tempting to him. "Oh! I'm sorry! I didn't realize that anyone had been following me!"

Jasper only forced a slight smile knowing it would charm her, and he was sure to keep her emotions calm and under control. "I believe this is yours." He said, handing her scarf to her.

She gasped. "You're a southern gentleman… your accent…"

He nodded, keeping that same slight smile on his face, it was almost a smirk. "Yes, ma'am."

She took the scarf out of his still outstretched hand. "Thank you… so, where are you from?"

"Texas." He answered.

"Texas?" She breathed. "But, that's so far! What brought you here?"

"Travels. I wanted to see more of the world, and it has led me here." He answered.

She was nervous, he could feel her slight nervousness she could not keep eye contact with him, which was a good thing for Jasper, it made things easier for him. "Oh, that sounds nice… I wish I could travel."

This was going to be very easy for him, and he realized that. She wasn't going to want him to leave so easily. No, she would definitely follow him. "I must be going. It was nice running into you, and I'm glad I could help." He gestured to the scarf and then smiled quickly as he began walking away and then turning down a street he knew was very deserted. He could hear the woman following him, not being able to stop the smirk from forming on his face.

Once he was far enough out of view he slowed down and waited for her to close the gap between them. The moment that she was close enough, and before she realized what was happening he whirled around grabbing her, covering her mouth and keeping her calm with his ability to manipulate emotions. He managed to keep her silent, and out of sight as he drank from her feeling his thirst subside as he drank in long draws. He finished, and cleverly hid the body, feeling the remorse set in.

He growled and spun around and set off towards the city away from his house. He needed to get away from his solitude because he knew that if he spent any time alone that he would only have more time to detest his recent actions although it was necessary to sustain himself, and what better solution than to go somewhere where there may be other humans, although to be on the safe side a place where there would not be many humans.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Alice looked out of her hotel room window out at the weather. It was raining, a perfect day to be outside amongst the human population. She dressed and walked over to the small nightstand that was next to the bed where an umbrella lean against it. She wanted to go out and maybe see some stores, maybe she would indulge herself and buy a few clothes, and maybe a new pair of shoes. She had been wearing these same clothes for quite a while now, and being that she was in Philadelphia, and hadn't been here long, why not make a new start and buy herself something new to wear?

As she walked over to the chair where her coat hand over the back of it she froze, her eyes focusing not on anything in the room around her, but on what she saw in the vision…

_She was sitting on a tall stool, at a diner. It was fairly empty only a couple at a table talking quietly together and a few staff. She was tapping her fingers on the coffee cup in front of her which was now cold she had been waiting so long. The door to the diner opened and she looked over, unable to stop the smile from forming on her face because in front of her stood the man she had seen so many times, but never actually seen. There he was, standing directly in front of her after all the time that she had spent waiting. He looked shocked to see her there, and yet made no move to attack her._

Her vision ended abruptly, but a realization hit her. She had seen that diner before, it was like a puzzle piece being fitted together. She finally knew why she had this vision of this diner, the name of it and what the outside had looked like. This was where she was going to meet him, and she looked down at her clothes realizing that in her vision she was wearing the exact same thing.

"It's today… I meet him today…" She pulled her coat on, grabbed her umbrella and rushed out of the door not caring what time it was.

She needed to be at that diner so that she could be there when he arrived. She couldn't afford to miss a moment, and she didn't know when he would be there, only that he would be there. Somehow, the vision seemed so last minute, he hadn't been planning to be there originally it didn't appear. Alice didn't care what his reason was for his wanting to be there now, but Alice was ecstatic that it was going to happen sooner than had originally been anticipated.

Alice reached the diner and hopped up onto a stool at the counter, one of the ladies walked up to her immediately asking her if she needed anything. Alice ordered a cup of coffee which the lady returned and set in front of her in only moments. Looking around the diner she found the couple that she had seen in her vision and she could feel the nerves begin to kick in. It was really happening, she would finally be meeting him, and she could hardly contain her excitement despite the nervousness that threatened to knock that excitement. All she had to do now, was wait.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Jasper felt the rain come down harder as he turned the corner and saw a diner come into his view. He looked around at other things around him, and thought. A diner would be the last place that people would ever expect a vampire to go as they didn't eat human food, but nobody needed to know that. The sidewalks which had a tendency to be crowded with people walking in different directions were all empty due to the rain. Everyone had either ran into a building for cover, or they had decided not to come out in the first place.

He could feel that the rain had soaked through all of the layers of his clothing and he had to admit that the feeling of his clothes, soaking wet, was not exactly the best feeling in the entire world. He kept his head down as he tried to walk at a normal pace, at least for a human, towards the door of the diner. As he walked by the front window he peaked in only seeing three customers aside from those that worked there. It was the perfect opportunity not to be alone, and also not be overwhelmed by the scent of humans. He had just finished drinking from a human so his thirst was under control, but it sometimes hardly made it easier to be around them.

Jasper paused for a moment before he opened the door to the diner. He wasn't sure if going in would be the best idea, maybe he should go home. Something was telling him that he needed to go inside the diner, and he thought that maybe it was just his mind's way of telling him that he spent far too much time alone and cooped up inside his house.

Without another thought he pulled open the door and when he did so he was hit with a scent that clearly told him that there was someone inside this diner at the moment that was not human. He stood frozen for only a second before he told himself that it was too late to walk away now. Whoever it was inside that was a vampire now knew he was too, and that was without seeing his eye color, but they will have smelled him and seen his skin by now and known that he wasn't just another human off the street. He stepped farther inside, the door closing behind him, and now he had to face the source of the intoxicating vampire scent, and hope that he would not have to kill more innocent humans all due to a possible fight.


End file.
